Growing

"First you were a baby. Then you were a boy. Then you were a man. Then you were my Daddy," Josiah told me as I put him in bed. He is four (Why is grass green, Daddy?) and he wants to understand how everything relates to everything else.
"My eyes are shaped like yours, and Ethan's are shaped like Mama's."
"Yes, Josiah, that's right."
"But Ethan's eyes are blue, like yours, and mine are green like Mama's."
"That's true, baby."
"Why?"
Growing up is sometimes confusing, but always exciting. I thought about Josiah's progression for a minute. Baby, then boy, then man, then Daddy. I thought about all the other roles that I have taken on. Husband, Pastor, Friend...I got a driver's license, got my first job, moved out of the house, registered to vote, was fired from my first job...But all the while I am growing. I am either growing more like Jesus, or more like the world. I am learning to forgive, or I am building up my defenses, or both.
I have come to realize that I am called to change the world, but I can not even change myself. Only Jesus can work any good in me. Why do I think I can change others by myself? All I can do is point them to Christ.
You know, the more my son grows up, the more independent he becomes. But the more I grow up in Jesus, the more dependent I become.
Why?


(First posted on Saturday, June 28, 2008)